Saturday, December 4, 2010

I haven’t seen or heard from my four children 10 years ...





I haven’t seen or heard from my four children 10 years

I have been married for 20 years. I met my husband and married him at the age of 18. At the time, he had just emerged from the ruins of his previous marriage to a white woman.

I learnt that the woman lost her pregnancy and unable to get over the shock, she decided to commit suicide.

My husband and I met through my aunt who lives in Ibadan, Oyo State. His own parents still live in the city, even as I tell this story.

As it turned out, we were both properly married. Afterwards, he made an arrangement for me to join him in Germany, where he lived and worked.

Eventually, I joined him after I had given birth to our first child. Later, I gave birth to three other children. In all, we have three daughters and a son.

For awhile, we lived happily together until matters took a different turn when I was delivered of the fourth child. I was afflicted by a mysterious illness, which affected my nervous system.

Initially, my husband stood by me and tried to see how I could get well again. But soon it became certain that we needed to find a cure for my illness back in Nigeria. Unfortunately, each time I was brought home for treatment, I seemed to get better only to relapse when I returned to Germany.

After what seemed like our last visit to Nigeria together for treatment, my husband shrewdly abandoned me in my aunt’s home. But I kept responding well to treatment and gradually recovered.

Initially, my husband had allowed two of our children to stay with me. But it was for a short time. One after the other, he took both of them back to Germany and abandoned me to my fate.

For a long time, he did not even bother to learn how I was doing. It was not long before I realised that he was unable to cope with the pressure that came with my illness, he had finally dumped me.

As a result, I have not seen or heard from my children since 2000. My aunt and her husband have been responsible for my upkeep and medical care.

To make matters worse, my parents-in law, both of who are church leaders, and my other in-laws, have stopped showing empathy for my plight.

My husband has since stopped communicating with me. He has refused to take responsibility for my upkeep and has stopped sending me money, no matter how meagre.

As my health improved, so did my yearning to reunite with my family, especially my children, in Germany.

Anyone who has visited a labour room can tell that it is impossible to assume that one was never there.

I got the shock of my life when I called my second child on the phone to wish him happy birthday and he replied that he did not know me.

Subsequently, I made an effort to travel to Germany and see things for myself. In the process, I discovered the height of man’s inhumanity to a fellow man.

When I got to the German visa office in Cotonou, Benin Republic, I was coldly informed, after enduring much tossing around and suspicion, that I had been declared dead many years back by my husband. He obviously wanted to get rid of my memory in order to settle down with another woman.

Eventually, I learnt that he had remarried and fathered more children.

What I can’t understand is why, even if he does not want me again, he is punishing me by keeping my children away from me. Why did he have to tell them that I am dead?

Is this not a subtle way of eventually killing me? I want the German Embassy to look into this issue and help me apprehend this man, so that I can have access to my beautiful children. They deserve to grow under my care. I am not dead, I am alive and well. The public should come to my rescue. I must not labour in vain.
Source:punchng.com

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